parents' divorce - is a shock for the child . How do you explain to the child that up to this point you had a father, and now it no and we ostaemya together? When parents divorce, a child, there are many questions and more pytaeshsya him to explain, the more questions he wondered.
divorcing her mother and father divorced with a child . Your first reaction after the divorce is understandable and natural, you do not want not, under any pretext to see your "ex" and his trips to visit the child and walk with him you do not like. Very rarely, when you are ready to move the offense on the back burner for the sake of the child, because the pain has not subsided, and the offense will remain for life. Child after the divorce and beyond continues to love his father as well as to divorce.
Mom, where the pope?
But the child grows and has a natural question arises about his father. Regardless of what you say, try to refrain from negative remarks. Do not forget that this man is not only your « former », but also the father of your wonderful child.
for single moms very important not to go from talking about his father. Try to satisfy the curiosity of your child, talk with him and answer his questions. Very often children who are unwilling witnesses to the divorce of parents, consider themselves responsible for the divorce. Make sure that the child would understand that divorce is only between mother and father, and not between them and the child, so it is not at fault.
Sometimes a child is enough to say that my father just would not live with us, and if you are at the same time behave naturally, the child vostrimet this as a natural course of events.
time to tell the truth
Growing up without a father, can very rapidly respond to others' dads and uncles because the child has a natural jealousy of foreign fathers to other children. After all, he has not, and should be. « Father far away, but very fond of you » works for the time being. The child grows and eventually wants to contact with their fathers, write him a letter, call or even had anything to do with him. This occurs somewhere between the ages of 10-12 years and then it is time to tell the child the truth. If you explain everything in a calm tone and atmosphere of trust, the child will hear you and understand.
Relationship with men
If you are a lone mother, lives with his mother and raising a child together, it's a catastrophe for the child. There is a high probability that the girl has grown up in such an atmosphere, will receive a suitcase full of complexes and problems. She may have permanent problems and complex when dealing with boys. And what is worse, it will unconsciously copy your behavior and will seek to give birth and raise a child alone or with her mother. The boys also difficult to adapt, without male education. They can learn, and be raised and diligent students, but they can be permanent problems in communicating with the opposite sex.
Children are very important experience in dealing with men, whether it be my grandfather or your relatives and friends. After all, our life consists of interaction and communication, and women and men complement each other. Your child should be developed comprehensively, not only on « Mama » scenario.
from divorce are not insured by anyone . But if you are hit, then the child is a serious mental trauma. And then, take it as a child depends on you, your attention and care. Do not be afraid to talk to your child about his father, he has a right to know. It is important how to say it and how to explain that to soften the blow. The time will come, and the child will understand, most importantly, what would be next to him was a man who could be trusted and who loved him.